I've been thinking a lot lately about why I can't seem to get anything done. It's not just my studio and revamped workshop that I've been promising to have finished for two years now....in my defense, I was sick a large part of that two years...... and it's not just the work that we HAVE to do on our house. No, it is also any sort of personal regime I try to start...diet, exercise, establishing some helpful or healthy habit.
So, I came across this author. I saw a video she'd done on FB. Evidently, I signed up to follow her at some time but I don't remember doing this. The author is Gretchen Rubin and after hearing her talk about the topics that have been concerning me, I downloaded two of her books, The Four Tendencies, which talks about the four personality types concerning getting work done, meeting deadlines and what's holding us back...I'll spoil the ending, it's ourselves...surprise!....and The Happiness Project, which follows the authors year long quest for more happiness and fulfillment in her life.
I've just started reading The Four Tendencies and already I can clearly see my problem with not being able to stick with any project to the end. I mean I'm amazing at planning and I'm pretty good at starting but finishing....well, our house has been a torn up mess for sixteen years now!!! I filled out a quiz....there is a link within the book...and I was told I am an obliger. As soon as I read the description, I knew this fit me like a kid glove. I will do anything others ask of me. They ask and it doesn't matter how I feel or what I have to do, I drop it all and go help them. But obligers can do this for others but not for themselves. If it is something that is personally beneficial, it doesn't get done. The big picture problem....my husband Steve is an obliger as well. For years, it has irritated me and often hurt my feelings that he might be too tired to fix something here but let a friend, family or neighbor call him and he's out the door. I thought it had to do with me but now, I can see, he's just like me.
So, what is the answer? We have to trick ourselves into thinking we're doing the work for someone else. That shouldn't be hard. I've had two people ask me this week when those coloring books will be published. So, I will finish the books for them. There are people who have been patiently waiting on new carvings for two years or longer. I will consider getting the work done on the house in general, studio and workshop as a deadline I must meet for them. I think eleven years is sufficient time to be over my burnout. And as for this house tumbling down around our ears, I think since the giant leap in our home owners insurance premiums...over $6000 a year I'm sad and ashamed to say...., I think Steve should see this as a deadline that MUST be met. He can say it's for me, he can say it's for our bank account but I think he can find that outside motivation needed to get the job done.
So, I came across this author. I saw a video she'd done on FB. Evidently, I signed up to follow her at some time but I don't remember doing this. The author is Gretchen Rubin and after hearing her talk about the topics that have been concerning me, I downloaded two of her books, The Four Tendencies, which talks about the four personality types concerning getting work done, meeting deadlines and what's holding us back...I'll spoil the ending, it's ourselves...surprise!....and The Happiness Project, which follows the authors year long quest for more happiness and fulfillment in her life.
I've just started reading The Four Tendencies and already I can clearly see my problem with not being able to stick with any project to the end. I mean I'm amazing at planning and I'm pretty good at starting but finishing....well, our house has been a torn up mess for sixteen years now!!! I filled out a quiz....there is a link within the book...and I was told I am an obliger. As soon as I read the description, I knew this fit me like a kid glove. I will do anything others ask of me. They ask and it doesn't matter how I feel or what I have to do, I drop it all and go help them. But obligers can do this for others but not for themselves. If it is something that is personally beneficial, it doesn't get done. The big picture problem....my husband Steve is an obliger as well. For years, it has irritated me and often hurt my feelings that he might be too tired to fix something here but let a friend, family or neighbor call him and he's out the door. I thought it had to do with me but now, I can see, he's just like me.
So, what is the answer? We have to trick ourselves into thinking we're doing the work for someone else. That shouldn't be hard. I've had two people ask me this week when those coloring books will be published. So, I will finish the books for them. There are people who have been patiently waiting on new carvings for two years or longer. I will consider getting the work done on the house in general, studio and workshop as a deadline I must meet for them. I think eleven years is sufficient time to be over my burnout. And as for this house tumbling down around our ears, I think since the giant leap in our home owners insurance premiums...over $6000 a year I'm sad and ashamed to say...., I think Steve should see this as a deadline that MUST be met. He can say it's for me, he can say it's for our bank account but I think he can find that outside motivation needed to get the job done.
all of her books are available on amazon.com
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